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Tuesday, 23 December 2003
ok...
another entry for today. Ok well, I'm kind of bummed about not going to tenesse. My dads work fucked it up big time. I was so excited I miss my peoples down there alot, I havent seen my uncle since my grandpa died *tear* oh joy tomorrows christmas eve...this is going to be horrible. When I'm home ill definatly be hibernating, If I can't at least talk to my grandpa I don't want to talk to anyone else....
on the better side of things, I love my bass. I finally learned how to read and write tabs, w00t I'm so happy, I can play "Die Eier Von Satan" by tool...w00t its pretty easy lol, and i was trying to play Iron Man, I'll have that down soon...w00t I'm so proud of myself!!
Posted by xxriotgrl666xx
at 10:47 PM EST
I finally,
found something that makes me happy, Seclusion. Not knowing what's going on with people around, not hearing anything from anyone. Although I'm not technically away, I'm happy. People are finally beginning to leave me alone in the house, and I can just stay in my room and keep to myself. I did almost nothing but play my bass and read, I was online for alittle while but not to long. I love isolation. I don't understand why people say its not healthy, I mean to a point yeah I can see it not being, but I'm fine now. There's so much emptiness, but yet not. I love the emptiness, the isolation, I find peace in it...aww I'm so pitiful lol...
Posted by xxriotgrl666xx
at 6:34 PM EST
Updated: Tuesday, 23 December 2003 6:37 PM EST
Sunday, 21 December 2003
It's been awhile,
since I've writen in here. Oh well. The past couple days have been ok, then joyful Christmas time comes along. I was fine up until my Dads girlfriends kid were opening their gifts. They both recieved gifts from they Grandpa, and I remembered...this is going to be the first year I don't get a gift from my grandpa. Not that I care, but it's the thought of knowing I'm never going to get that call saying "hey, how's your christmas?" or "I miss you and your sister, when are you coming to visit me and grandma". God I miss him so much. I would give anything to be able to see him right now. Christmas reminds me so much of him, and Grandma...and he's gone and she's really really really sick. I can't even be in the same room with her for more then five minutes without balling. I don't like this...everything I look at makesme think of him.
The last time I saw him was when he was lying in his casket, God I didn't even cry when I touched his cheek. It makes me sick. I should have cried. The family must have thought there was something wrong with me. Seeing him there has killed me. I miss him so much...
Posted by xxriotgrl666xx
at 6:09 PM EST
Monday, 15 December 2003
...
Today was funny as hell...well about half of it. It started off by me sleeping in because of the two hour delay bullshit, then come to find out after that we have another two hour delay so i'm like cool i'm going to stay home and sleep all day. But then Marisol's cuban ass apears at my house. I'm like ok i want to sleep. Then my mom calls and we find out there's no school. Yey for me i can finally sleep. Not quite... So marisol my sister and i are all running around being idiots...so then they leave, my mom comes home and shes like psycho and now im just feeling lone...very alone...
Posted by xxriotgrl666xx
at 6:51 PM EST
Sunday, 14 December 2003
feeling kinda sad about....
everything. I was fine most of the day up until now. Then the night comes and i feel so alone. I hate the fucking snow and i want it to melt and go away. Theres nothing much i have to bitch about right now...so yeah. I'm just mucho lonely and i want out of this place...someone come kidnap me please!?!?!!?
Posted by xxriotgrl666xx
at 7:00 PM EST
Saturday, 13 December 2003
i need you...
I need someone...i feel like everyone is falling away...thank god theres nothing around me that i could cause any possible damage with...
Posted by xxriotgrl666xx
at 9:39 PM EST
...
This is he beginning of the diary of Tiffany Fuller(mtv moment) In 11 days I leave for tenesse...I can't wait. I need out of this place, I will make no contact with anyone except Bri and maybe a couple others but i highly doubt it. No one will miss me, I'm sure people will be glad that they get to go with out hearing/seeing me for about a week.
*I want to leave this place so bad. I see no point in anything anymore. I'm 14 and already dead inside...(pathetic). I actually contemplated suicide today, then i thought about brizzel and my sister and i couldnt possibly leave either of them behind....enough said...i cant even type anymore with out crying...hmph and i didnt even get out half of what i had to say*
Posted by xxriotgrl666xx
at 8:58 PM EST
Monday, 8 September 2003
this world sucks....
Err this world is so evil. I strive for uniqueness and acceptence, but the two just aren't compatable! What the hell is wrong with the world? Why are people so judgemental and ignorant? It angers me alot! I am not only depressed bacause of the unwanted chants of "goth" and "freak" in school...i am enraged. I mean come on grow up...since when does someone have to tear someone else down to make themselves feel better? No one seems to give a fuck...I dont know why I even bother to write this bullshit.
Posted by xxriotgrl666xx
at 4:45 PM EDT
Friday, 22 August 2003
my day.....
ok well today is august 22nd and im madd confused....but other then that my day was ok...kinda boring. im mad confused abt where i stand with....nvm im not gonna type it here...but neways on to better things i got my spacers today hoo hah hurts like a mother fucker and their madd annoying i wanna take em out but i cant blah....well besides that i got the oct. issue of metal edge great interveiw with phil...I LOVE IT...i love that man hes so my idol if u dont like him FUCK YOU'
Posted by xxriotgrl666xx
at 6:03 PM EDT
Tuesday, 19 August 2003
hoo hah
hoo hah...i havent given out the link yet...but hoo hah the first posty thing!!!!
Posted by xxriotgrl666xx
at 11:20 AM EDT
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