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Sunday, 21 December 2003
It's been awhile,
since I've writen in here. Oh well. The past couple days have been ok, then joyful Christmas time comes along. I was fine up until my Dads girlfriends kid were opening their gifts. They both recieved gifts from they Grandpa, and I remembered...this is going to be the first year I don't get a gift from my grandpa. Not that I care, but it's the thought of knowing I'm never going to get that call saying "hey, how's your christmas?" or "I miss you and your sister, when are you coming to visit me and grandma". God I miss him so much. I would give anything to be able to see him right now. Christmas reminds me so much of him, and Grandma...and he's gone and she's really really really sick. I can't even be in the same room with her for more then five minutes without balling. I don't like this...everything I look at makesme think of him.
The last time I saw him was when he was lying in his casket, God I didn't even cry when I touched his cheek. It makes me sick. I should have cried. The family must have thought there was something wrong with me. Seeing him there has killed me. I miss him so much...
Posted by xxriotgrl666xx
at 6:09 PM EST
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